by Ben Wagner
”Death and life are in the power of the tongue; And they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.”
Proverbs 18:21 (ASV)
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” is obviously one of the most baseless phrases ever conceived. Without looking too much into its history, I’m just going to hope and pray this saying was supposed to be ironic. I’ve been on this earth for 21 years now, and in the time I’ve been blessed with, I’ve been wounded by words more than anything. Upon reflection and to my surprise, I’ve realized that the words that have wounded me the most have been my own.
Proverbs 18:21 (ASV) states, ”Death and life are in the power of the tongue; And they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Now, my entire life I’ve always put this into the context of others’ words affecting me deeply and drastically. My mind always drifted towards movies like “Spider-Man” (2000) where Peter Parker is harassed and bullied relentlessly by the high-school jock Flash Thompson. The words sting the very soul of Peter who longs for something greater to come from his life. While Proverbs 18:21 can reflect the impact that others’ words can have on us, I do believe that this verse is also meant to be turned internally.
I’ve been a church technology consultant for over half a decade now. One thing I’ve realized is that many people do not know just how important Proverbs 18:21 can be. One of the hardest things I go through as I serve those in ministry, has been to hear the way they speak of themselves in relation to their position.
“What goes around comes around” as they say – and no, that does not only refer to your looping announcements on a Sunday morning.
photo courtesy of David May, MediaShout
What we reap we sow.
That isn’t a pretty little phrase. It is Biblical truth. It is the heart of God. It is used as a tool to teach us, mold us, correct us, and grow us into who we were meant to be…
The words we speak will come back to either haunt us or bless us in the long run.
Which would you choose if given the option? I know my answer.
In my time talking to thousands of churches across the world, I have heard some of the most beautiful word echo out of the mouths of technicians, secretaries, pastors, and the like.
On the other hand I’ve also heard some of the most destructive words spoken over themselves, their team, or their church.
Phrases like this have weighed heavy on my heart and conscious for a long, long time:
- “I’m no good when it comes to technology, at all.”
- “I’m stupid when it comes to this stuff.”
- “These crazy technical issues ALWAYS happen to me.”
- “I’m an idiot with this.”
- “You’re talking to a dummy here…”
There have been times going home from work that I’ve been genuinely heart-broken over the way I’ve heard people speak over themselves. It’s helped me realize that in many areas, I’ve done the same thing to myself.
Now understand me when I say that I am not shaming you if you have said things like this to yourself. All I’m trying to do is point out that our words have power over ourselves. You won’t succeed in everything you do related to your calling, but that doesn’t make YOU any less smart, dedicated, or valuable in your efforts and work. If you flipped those words into powerful statements, I suspect that you’d ultimately see a lot more successes!
- “I can do this.”
- “I will learn.”
- “I am proud of how far I’ve come with the technology here.”
The truth is as I have struggled with this in my own life both personally and in the church technology sector is that Jesus wouldn’t talk to me the way that “I talk to me”…
In Matthew 12:35-37 (NIV) it says “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgement for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”
One of the coolest things about this passage is that it doesn’t shame you for having empty words, it simply tells you that your empty words will be accounted for one way or the other. Either we choose to use our words and ask for forgiveness and enter into being “acquited”, or they will condemn us. Not as punishment, but as simple truth… Your words have power.
I believe that is a perspective shift that can take us into an entirely new dimension within our personal lives, our jobs, and our volunteer work.
If we start talking to ourselves like Jesus talks to us, how much more could we accomplish with Him?
Call To Action: Present and Accounted For
What phrases or declarations would you think could give you or your team more confidence this year?
For myself, my family, my business, my church, and my technology it is a season to change, grow, and transition. It is a season to refresh.
Scripture such as:
- “Behold I’m doing a new thing, do you not perceive it?”
- “Ask, Seek, and Knock.”
- “Let your yes be yes, and your no be no.”
Have really made a deep impact on my life both in how I relate to myself and others.
Be encouraged and please reach out if you’d like to connect more on my journey in this and in faith.
So, what declarations and identity statements would you feel could give your life more confidence? Are there team statements you already have that each of us could use?
Let me know, feel free to reach out and connect with me, I would love to meet you personally!
And, as always, God bless you and your ministry.
Ben Wagner’s passion is “spreading the simple gospel through simple technology.” He lives in Nashville, Tennessee with his wife and son, with a baby girl expected to arrive in June of 2024. In his spare time he enjoys making, recording, and playing music, skateboarding, and date nights at the movies!
